Kim Ji-woon’s new film, The Good, The Bad, The Weird, is a bright, fast-paced, all guns blazing, technicolour noodle western. Now, the term ‘action adventure’ may make you shudder, but when that adventure is set in the political, geographical and social hinterland of 1930s Manchuria and the action includes a dagger in the arse from a group of children, you may well change your mind.
As the name implies, it’s inspired by Sergio Leone’s The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, and includes some of the greatest fight scenes this side of the wild west. All three of the main characters, played by Korean megastars Song Kang-ho, Lee Byung-hun and Jung Woo-sung are in turn ruthless, fearless, gravity-defying and seemingly invincible as they terrorise trains, dodge bullets and, in the grand finale, take on an entire battalion of the Japanese army.
Of course, this wins it a position in my top 10 fight sequences of all time. But what, in no particular order, are the others?
Kill Bill (2003)
The Bride vs The Crazy 88
When an ex-model takes on a group of crazed assassins, dressed as a motorbike courier with little more than a sword between her and a squirting, painful death, you know you’re in for a good fight scene. In Europe and America this scene had to be screened in black and white after it was deemed just too gruesome for words (well, there is a shot of a gushing decapitated neck) while in Asia the screens became a kaleidoscope of red.
The Warriors (1979)
The Warriors vs. The Baseball Furies
This late ’70s New York trash punk masterpiece is full of awesome chase and fight scenes, but the showdown between the leather waistcoat-clad Bronx boys and the terrifying monochrome Baseball Furies is surely the best. The Baseball Furies look like the bastard grandchildren of Marilyn Manson and Babe Ruth as they chase The Warriors through the park. Best line? “I’ll shove that bat up your ass and turn you into a popsicle.”
Ong Bak (2003)
The Villagers vs. Ting
The opening scene of this Thai martial arts film is one of the greatest and unlikeliest fight scenes I’ve ever seen. Ting (Tony Jaa), the monk-like reluctant fighter must beat his fellow villagers to the top of a huge Bhodi tree in order to catch the flag and the others’ respect. As bodies thud to the ground, Ting scrambles monkey-like to the top of the branches, before being chased all the way down by dusty, disgruntled and down right dirty challengers.
Mean Streets (1973)
Poolhall Brawl
To the unlikely soundtrack of ‘Mr Postman’ by The Marvelettes, the fight scene in the basement pool hall in Mean Streets is not only excellent for its realistically confused, clumsy fighting but for the fantastic end piece during which they all have to ‘play nice’ in front of the police officers (“It’s not a knife, it’s a toothpick… this is my cousin Charlie!”). One of De Niro’s great portrayals of an unhinged scoundrel and one of Scorsese’s most wry looks at New York’s gang war culture.
The Good, The Bad, The Weird (2009)
Shotgun Carnage
Possibly the best fight scene sees the thief-cum-fool Yoon Tae-goo don a deep sea diving helmet – a reference to Clint Eastwood’s metal plate in A Fistful of Dollars – and stumble through the alleys and wooden shacks of some Manchurian outpost, shooting wildly, as Park Do-won swings above him, taking out almost the entire rival gang with just one shotgun.
Hot Fuzz (2007)
Midtown Madness
Clearly indebted to Michael Mann’s Heat, this brilliant scene in which Simon Pegg and Nick Frost take on an entire town of elderly middle-class psychopaths nails the film’s genius tightrope walk between comedy and action.
Rambo (1982)
Rambo vs. Helicopter
Clad in just a greasy sheet of tarpaulin, armed with only his knife (and a rather splendid perm), Rambo takes on helicopters, guns, the police and a whole heap of rednecks with his traps, his guerrilla tactics and sheer, 100 percent tough guy brute force. As his ex-army captain says, “I didn’t come to rescue Rambo from you. I came here to rescue you from him.“ Greatest moment? Probably the forest scene in which he takes out the police helicopter using only a rock.
Indiana Jones (1981)
Indiana Jones vs. Airplane Mechanic
In the greatest pantomime moment since Mrs Twanky’s husband died, the burly bald Airplane Mechanic forgets to ‘look behind you’ as the lethal propeller edges his way. During the filming of the scene, Harrison Ford tore a ligament in his left leg as the plane rolled over him, but he carried on with nothing but a pack of ice to soothe the pain. Tough guy.
Godfather III (1990)
Vincent vs. Archbishop Gilday
As a grave and surprisingly hairy Pacino sits watching the opera, the corrupt and the corruptible are murdered across the city. Don Lucchesi is stabbed in the throat with his own glasses, while the Archbishop Gilday is shot on the spiral stairs. The shot of the murdered Archbishop falling though the air towards the camera, down the great shaft of the stairwell, is one of the most haunting post-fight moments in cinema.
Monty Python andd the Holy Grail (1975)
Arthur vs. The Black Knight
‘Tis but a scratch!’ Two minutes of the greatest and most hilarious British school boy, stiff upper lip, surreal fighting ever seen on screen.
Now, I don’t want things to get nasty here, so tell us, what are your favourite fight scenes?
